Friday, December 5, 2014

Sunlight Through the Clouds

Where does one even begin after a 16 month hiatus? Well, my friends, I guess I'll just begin here.

This last year was one for the books. 

When my friend Kassie got engaged to her boyfriend Dane, I had to find a new place to live. I really wanted to get my own place, but I spent all of my savings on a signed Tony Hawk collectors edition skateboard (which was TOTALLY worth the dough), so I ended up moving back down south to share a room with a friend of a friend in Times Square {pictured below}. 

From the first day I got there, I knew the peeps there weren't really my scene, you know? Like, no one shopped at Hot Topic or owned any cool band merch. Whatever. I liked my roommate. She shared my passion for all things LOTR and Dungeons and Dragons, and even introduced me to the beautiful world of WOW and COD {aka World of Warcraft and Call of Duty}. 

Unfortunately she was kind of a hoarder. Our entire front room was filled with all things dog: at least 10 bags of dog food (the majority open and spilling onto the floor), dog toys, dog leashes, dog posters, dog sweaters, dog kennels, dog brushes, dog everything. I didn't really mind, I mean we didn't actually have a dog, but my roommate just wanted to be prepared in case we ever came across a stray. I get that. I was a boy scout when I was little, so I know the importance of being prepared. And yes, boy scouts, not girl scouts. My mom dropped me off at the wrong house on the first day, and I went for 5 years without anyone in the troop realizing I was a girl. It was strangely rewarding for me. I was Mulan in real life, but that's beside the point. 

All of the dog shiz blocked the front door, so if I wanted to leave, I had to go through my bedroom window and down the fire escape (from the 5th floor). After doing that 3 times in order to get to work at Jake's Archery (America's Bowhunting Headquarters since 1962), I finally convinced my boss to let me track inventory from home. I stayed in inside for days at a time and quickly developed bed sores all over my body. I started losing interest anything outside our condo walls and even gave up my job and 40% discount at Jake's so I could dedicate all of my time to destroying 12 year olds on COD. My life was at an all time low. But I couldn't stop. I couldn't change.

Then one day, I saw sunlight through the clouds (in COD on level 7). The animation felt so real. The brightenss overcame me. I soon realized my roommate had just turned on the light for the first time in months. It felt warm. Comforting. Familiar. I wanted more of it. And even though it pained me to say it, I knew I had to leave. I packed up my bags that very day and slid down the fire escape without looking back. 

As I rode my horse to my parent's farm in Draper, I didn't know what lay ahead of me. I didn't even know if they'd let me move back in. But got the  feeling that world was my oyster, and that it would all work out somehow. I'm still on that horse, mustering the courage to knock on my parents front door. Please keep me in your prayers, hoping that they'll have a little compassion.

Thanks for listening to my story. Ta ta for now.